The "L" word

Murmurs Mumblings - MyThoughts (conversation with myself, rants, and more mumblings) The “L” Word

February is here. As an earthling, i think i am allowed to be mushy from time to time.
Sometimes, mush is good...(allow only 5% though) and eating ampalaya is good too from time to time. With the risk of losing face and my mushroom image, i like to blabber a few things on the L-word. Further disclaimer: am not a subject matter expert, i just want to jot down the things i learned so far.


* Sometimes you don't have to look for love; it would come and hit you with a big hammer when you least expect it
Fate likes to tease. When you work yourself hard up to reach for someone, only big hairy
gremlins will parade on your nose. There are even instances, when you are looking good and feeling confident that you are ready to bump to your "target", chances are you won't. But on the days you look like a pork-meat-bun-squashed-under-a train-couch, you will bump into that person. Well, if the person indeed loves you, then he wouldn't mind what you look like then

* Love is a selfish emotion
People don't love because the other person asks to. It's a feeling oneself can feel. No one can make anyone feel anything other what they really feel. Feelings don't lie, they either get accepted or disregarded.


* Absence makes the heart grow fonder
Try not to be too available. Chances are, presence will eventually be taken for granted


* You cannot learn to love a person you don't like
Although, for some people this works, for some it doesn't. If you are trying to learn to love a person, just because your biological is ticking, all your friends are getting married and you are afraid to be alone. Better stop it. It will be just deluding yourself to like the person and it will be unfair for both of you


* It takes two to tango
Learn to compromise, but do not always do the bending. It has to be both ways.


* Love is not pity
Don't love a person just because you feel sorry for them. It's not even love.


* Long distance relationships is always a battle of the wit
Both of you will be faced with the eternal decision to:pin your hope and feeling for that person or to throw it all away for a pair of arms that are within proximity



* Love is not a thing of today only
Loving a person means loving who that person was (You cannot ask the person to get rid his past love or faults) and would be.


* Love is not a thing to fill a gap to feel complete
i still believe, completeness should come from oneself. It will definitely take awhile and the road might be bumpy. if you love a person because there is a need in you (afraid to be left alone, shelved or plain lonely), once that need is fulfilled already, then the 'love' is gone also.The sense of fulfillment has to come from oneself,it can't be found elsewhere


* Sometimes love can be phantom pain
Clinical description of phantom pain,is the pain felt for a missing limb. Sometimes you feel the pain because you lack something, lost something that wasn't initially there. Just take heart to let the phase pass and don't do anything stupidly rash like grabbing the person that will fall into your line of vision.



* love cannot be buried immediately. It just dies a slow death
sometimes, no matter how we like to delete an existence of person in our memory we just can't. You need to face the slow degradation of everything. One need to learn to stand
again and chin up. Remove all the stuffs that will remind that person (even gradually will do), it's the only way to make room for new memories.



* Sometimes it's not good to wait
Don't wait for things to get better. It’ll be totally frustrating after waiting, things didn't get better


* There is a level of likeness and it varies
Since feelings are a qualitative entity, we cannot demand the exact percentage of love to be given to us. A person probably likes to hang with you, talk with you and laugh with you, but it doesn't always mean that that person is in love with you. Probably, you are great friends but will not do as lovers. May i borrow the wisdom of my friend DayOhBee "Pag walang spark, walang spark"


* Love is something you feel and discern
If it is purely feelings, probably it's just an infatuation or you're being a drama queen. But if it'swithout feeling it's just rationalization



* No matter how overwhelming an emotion can be, sometimes it's better not to do anything or say anything
Sometimes, it's better to sit down and think thoroughly of the situation. The embarassment might not be worth it.


* You don't need a partner to love life
I agree it would be nice to have someone to share your love with. But it is also nice to be
alone and enjoy life. The first time we drew breathe, there was already a 50% chance that you'll meet your special someone and 50% that there is just no one for you. Either way, the only point is that don't let your partner or absence of your partner be the reference of being happy in life.


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I ask my friend's mum how is her holiday, (she is visiting her daughter here)

Mum: Oh, it's okay. I went to ChnaTown this afternoon. Chinese must go to ChinaTown winks*

Wakanga! she's one kewl mum :)

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Added one more link/the blog of our fave , beautiful and jaded lil sis: kayanski!


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Dear Chili Prends,
I am already excited about the fan day of Bitter OCampo. As the most voluptuous chili (Epooh) said it: kway teow facing the bay.
Then we can tumble, split, headstand, eggroll sabay nose bleed.